Cafe Chat

What is one habit, negative pattern, or sin that has been passed down your family line from generation to generation that you do not want to pass down to your own family line? What steps are you taking to make sure the habit, pattern or sin is not repeated in your own family?

As you know, my mom is an alcoholic. She used it to self medicate. She also had drugs that the doctor would give her for her nerves etc. She stopped in the 80's when both Ron and her were told by the doctor to stop drinking or else. They went to AA and didn't look back. Mom had a moment during a Christmas after Krista's death, but she has remained sober. Alcohol and drug usage has been passed down in my family. My mother's sister is an alcoholic. Both of my brothers have used drugs and alcohol but now seem to be not using. And you know Kari has been in recovery this year and will celebrate one year on July 19th! I am so very proud of her.

Kari is the one generation that changes this habit or pattern in our family. Because of her bravery, she sought help. In seeking help, she discovered she has ADHD. ADHD is passed down and it is by belief that all those that have self medicated with alcohol and drugs has done so because of them having ADHD. By her prayers and the grace of God, the pattern will end with her.

So how come I didn't drink? Good question. I've asked myself the same question. Even when I thought at times that I wished I could go out and have a "drink" just to get away from "things", I never followed through. I have a few answers to that one question. First, I became a Christian as a young girl and I think God saved me from the need. I don't think that I am special and I know that many Christians I am sure have had to be saved from drugs and alcohol. But for some reason, I never wanted to use it to soften life or needed it. I had a class in college and they said that alcoholism was passed down. I didn't think it was right to put a sentence on me... so I decided right then that I would never touch the stuff. If I didn't get hooked, then I wouldn't have the problem, I decided. Another explanation is that maybe I don't have the gene... maybe it skipped me. Also, being the oldest, I saw what it did to my mom and to my family. I was very angry at alcohol so I didn't want to have anything to do with it. And I am stubborn/tenacious... and this time for a good cause. All of those reasons large or small, played a part.

Mom

Mom will be going home today from the hospital. I have not yet found out what AMR is exactly but there are liasons in her colon cause by a medication that she takes daily. She has to get off of that medication for a few weeks so that the liasons can heal. She, other than that and the other things I have mentioned, is fine. She will be feeling better soon.

Today we have another 160 students from a middle school near by the college. We had the other 160 7th grade students last week. It will be busy. Next week we have two middle schools coming for a visit. May is very middle school busy.

Again, thank you for praying for mom. I know some of you will be off for a blog free weekend so have a good time. It is going to be close to 90 degrees here to day. I know... it happens here too.
HUGS

Update: Mom

Well, I talked with Ron this morning. He told me that she was moved to another room and that is why I couldn't get her on that phone number. I was hoping maybe that they had released her. He said that she called this morning as he was leaving for work wanting her wallet. She wanted to get her hair done. He was a little concerned about that comment and so I said that I would call her now that I had the number to her bedroom.

Mom picked up the phone and sounded tired still. But when she realized who I was, her voice brightened up a little. She said that she had thought that they were "fixing" hair for the patients. She knew that she was in a hospital but she thought they were doing hair so she thought she needed money. I heard her then ask a nurse that was in her room about this special "program" she thought was happening and the nurse said "no, you are in a hospital". Mom said that she knew she was in a hospital but... I came in with "maybe you dreamt it". She agreed that everyone didn't know anything about it so she must have dreamt it. She said that she was hungry because since she had been in the hospital they have only given her water and juice. I guess that would be true because of the tests they had given her. So that is a good sign. She said that she would get back into bed and behave. I told her to misbehave if they didn't feed her so they would shut her up with food... and she laughed.

They said that she has AMR, whatever that is. In my terms, it is something like a slow oil leak in a car (oil being the blood and the car being a person). This is entirely something different than what she had a couple of months before. Last time she didn't take her medicine that flushes the water out of her system. She lost 28 pounds of water in a few days once she got in the hospital. Incredible. What made her wait to go into the doctor, I will never know. So, you see... and Ron is there and can't do any better and getting her to do the right things. Although in her defense, I guess this time isn't due to her not taking care of herself correctly. The doctor will tell her today what they are going to do about this diagnosis.

All of this is a good reminder to keep working on myself because in twenty years we can make a difference in our health... eating right, walking etc, drinking water, and getting rest. That should keep me out of trouble just doing that with all the other things I do. So, Denise, if you are reading this... Keep those healthy recipes coming! And Darylynn, even though you missed your last appointment, your story keeps me reminded to make my appointments too.

Well, there you have it. I thank you for your prayers and good thoughts. Until tomorrow... HUGS from Seattle

My Last Post on My Trip to CA

Riley playing at the park near Eva's house. I thought that the rollers on this slide were strange to have on a child's play equipment. I went over to it to check to see how possible it would be to get tiny fingers caught. Hmmmm, it ended up being ok but not having my full approval, we moved on to another play equipment.

Eva... she can walk the walk... and walk and talk. LOL

That's better. I good old fashion swing. Remember doing this as a kid? I just taught it to Riley and here he is pretending he is Superman or Spiderman... or both. He loves playing in the park. In California they have sand in the play areas which is different than in WA... we have a foam rubber mat or bark (yes, bark, and that isn't a good idea because of splinters) because it works well with the wetness here.

I wasn't able to get anyone on the phone last night so I decided to wait til morning. I know if there was something really wrong, Ron would have called. Funny thing is that I used the number that Ron gave me which went directly to her bed today but another woman answered. I will update this blog as soon as I know. HUGS and have a good day.

My Brother Jon

Jon

OK, the "look" is for me. He was letting me know that he doesn't like his picture taken. Like a true sister, that didn't stop me from taking his picture. Here in this photo he is cleaning and straightening Eva's garage. He is a great handyman and his VERY organized. He has a special "touch"... a mess would look good if he just touched it. Do you know what I mean? For those of you that are keeping score, I have two brothers. I am the oldest; Jon is four years younger; David is ten years younger; and Krista (died at age 20, 1992) was 16 years younger than me. I was born in 1955, during the Happy Days era. Disneyland opened that year too. Both of my brothers have a great sense of humor. David is really quick and can rapid fire off jokes. Jon is more quite and more sarcastic... but very fun to be around. They could have both been comedians.

In True Sisterly Fashion... I took another picture for good measure. All of that stuff was neatly gone through and stored by the time I came back again. Good job Jon, looking out for Eva.

Last night when I spoke to my mom she sounded very tired and old. I hope she doesn't read this (although I don't think she will in the hospital). She said that the test they gave her, where they take a tube and with a camera to look for bleeding, went well. We will not know what the results are until tomorrow. She said that if there isn't anything there, they will go "the other way" and check that direction. She will not be getting out of the hospital for a few days. She had a heart valve surgery in 2002, so she does have heart problems. She has many pills that she takes for Diabetes 2 etc. She isn't in the best of health. So, yeah, I am a little concerned. I also so know that people grow old and the pass on. The timing of it is in the Lord's hands. Is that this time? One never knows for sure. I don't think it is but it a step towards that day somehow. Here is a picture of us a few years ago: Mom, Me, Kari (21), and Brittany (11) in clockwise order before she had the heart surgery. Please keep praying and thinking good thoughts. I really appreciate it. HUGS

Prayer Request

This morning I discovered that my mom has been hospitalized. She was short of breath on the Saturday I saw her but then began to feel better. She said that she would go to the doctor's but I guess she didn't. She fooled me when she went for a day trip to Solvang last Saturday. There is one of the reasons I went down to visit her; to see for myself because I don't get the "truth" from a distance. Monday morning it was harder for her to breath and so she asked Ron to take her to Urgent Care. He took her to the emergency room and they kept her when they discovered that she is bleeding "somewhere". Today we find out where that somewhere is. So if you could pray for her today, I would appreciate it. Thanks

My Father, Robert Frazier Davis

My Dad's Grave Site

One of the things I do when I visit my family in So Cal is to go put flowers on my dad's grave site. Last year I brought Aaron and Dave. Riley and I stopped by on our way to see my brother David which I wrote about the other day. Dad is buried in Orange, CA in the OC. Not far from there is a beautiful traffic circle surrounded by old antique shops. There is a fountain right in the middle of the park that the traffic circle goes around. It was full of beautiful spring flowers and people were walking everywhere.

Riley is just now learning about heaven and people going to heaven. I made it a very positive experience for him and he helped me put the flowers that you see there. Dad would have loved the idea that Riley was there. Dad didn't take all this very seriously... graves etc. He, in fact, made jokes while we tried to discuss the idea of where he wished to be buried. He talked about "Digger O'Dell" the friendly undertaker that was on his radio station shows he once listened to when he was young. None of this seems morbid to me because of how we believe. He once told us that he wanted us to come to his grave sight not to mourn but to just enjoy the peacefulness... to picnic and be happy.

Have a Happy Day!

Meeting Susan in California

Susan and Me

Susan and I met at the Baja Fresh in Costa Mesa on Harbor near her work. It was really great to finally meet her and someone that is from amongst my blogging friends. Although it was the first time I had ever met her, it really seemed like we had known each other for a long time... and it wasn't the first time. We have so much in common. We discovered that we are the same age. We are both grandmothers... and how important prayer is in our lives.

My stepmom, Eva, took this picture. She was really making me laugh as she was trying to figure out each camera etc. Riley was there too. Susan had brought some coloring books for both Riley and Brady with some crayons from the post office. Riley went right to work and gave us some time without interuption.

I hope to see Susan again. I am really glad that we met and I am glad that we can communicate by posting and comments. I hope to meet many of you too just like Susan has done.

Have a nice day... Happy Monday!

Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mother's Day!!!

Have a great day! More pics tomorrow.